Tuesday, August 11, 2009

You are so predictable

Few things continue to amaze me - or should I say amuse me when it comes down to human nature.
One of those things is predictability. Instinct takes over intelligence in most cases.
This is the difference between a chess player and a master. The ability to control emotion is often blurred by the need of vengeance. Action/reaction kind of theory.
I slap you – you strike back. Instantly. No second thoughts. Why?
Two reasons – 1st humiliation needs retaliation. NOW.
2nd your brain can’t think that fast.
Not so long ago I was engaged in a relationship where happy ending was not an option. Not only was it written danger all over it but blindness of the moment weakened my perception to the max.
Recovery is often judged by the capacity to think ahead in a cold-blooded manner.
Hopefully at 40+ I was able to resource myself surrounded by family and kids who cherish me with an incredible passion [THANK YOU].
It didn’t take too long before I initiated a series of behavioral experiences based on the same items that caused my fall. In a sick threesome relationship I was able to seed info and collect data – thank you Twitter. It was almost incredible to monitor demeanor and emotion of anger. Blinded by strong emotion and compulsive obsession my wannabe partner developed a transparent pattern of actions.
Anger became a motive to hate and defamation. It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. I believe post relationship crisis management reveals a person.
During the course of my –very unreliable- study I found out there is a strong relationship between obsession and addictive behaviors.
Addicts are obsessed by nature. They need to kill the obsession to move past the addiction. There is no cure without containing the obsessive anger.
This post is not a personal note or subliminal message to re-engage into a conversation with past acquaintances. It’s a testimony on how changing my behaviors and demeanor, really improved my relationships with others both professionally and personally.
You can go from predictable to changeable. Adding rationality to life was my best move.


Anonymous said...

Basing a study on observation is indeed a scientific approach.
Saying addicts are obsessive is an understatement. Inner rage can force them to irrational decisions.
I enjoyed reading this post.
Looking forward for more.

Anonymous said...

This post is GREAT!!! If Florian were to write a book about it, I would be the first one to buy it.